You know This website was designed to help Military personnel find important information and answers to their questions. Not for their spouses to jump on here and air out their dirty laundry and create cat fights in a 10 paragraph monologue. It seems as though you only care about promotions and financial benefits, but in the same breath you criticize the very same organization that provides those promotions and benefits. My advice is to complain to the FRG http://www.armyfrg.org/skins/frg/home.aspx not to the soldiers.

The first thing I would like to bring to everyone’s attention is, BEFORE, you sit down in front of your computer and begin trouncing your ridiculous criticism around at peoples valid blogs, you should take a moment to put yourself in their shoes. See the world from their eyes. I will say that a spouse has every right to bring an issue to the soldiers chain of command and/or his NCO support channel. Reason being, is although she may not be in the army and she may not be working, she is still a soldiers wife, very active and supportive in his job profession, and obviously has some knowledge of the inner workings of the army. Which to me, shows she cares, is involved and is obviously in some way, shape, or form being affected by her husbands situation. For some of you married people in this blog, if your spouse were to be promised a promotion and pay raise (whether it is civilian world or military) and didn’t receive it after numerous attempts to rectify some type of paper trail problem, im pretty sure you would be extremely hot headed as well, especially if the promotion is well deserved. Another thing to consider is although she is an Army wife and is aware of what that entails, it is hard for anyone to accept that their spouse/ loved may be in harms way at any given moment. Some of the incentives for accepting that are entitlements such as: BAH, separation pay, BAS, GUARNTEED PAY (for the one in recruiting school), ect… and when those promises turn into empty ones it can cause extreme undue stress on the soldier and the family. Also, we all know how the Army is extremely frightened of negative publicity; fair to say? If your answer is yes, I want you to image an extremely angered spouse, respectfully, going to the BN CSM and bringing up an issue that is causing her this much aggravation. Chances are if she has to bring this much attention to an issue at that high of an echelon, someone in her husbands unit isn’t competent in his/her job and probably needs to be relieved or addressed and corrected. Now, I too come from a unit in which the S-1 is extremely disorganized. When I went to the board they misplaced my 3355, commanders evaluation, and my college transcripts (they never added my points in). I too endured some of these same problems she is experiencing. Thankfully, my (acting) company commander and (acting) 1st SG at the time were some pretty squared away individuals and are well liked by people in my division HQ and were able to repair some of the damages my S-1 had caused.

All of you need to realize that these blogs are viewed by the public. In most cases, when you type an inquiry about the army into a search engine one of your senseless and undue conversations arise within the 1st page of options. For you NCO’s in this blog, you need to refresh your memory on the NCO creed, especially the first and last line; “No one is more professional than I.”…….“I will not forget nor will I allow my comrades to forget that we are PROFESSIONALS, Noncommissioned Officers, Leaders”! So, if you think it would be appropriate/ Professional to go onto a publicly broadcasted TV station and say half the moronic curse words, and negative things you say…….then I think you should be the one we are addressing as the “E-4” in this situation.

92F_KING: In your earlier blog you ask “what has the army done to you”?
I would have to say that the Army, more specifically her husbands unit, on numerous accounts, has proven itself to me extremely unorganized and unmotivated to assist her in her troubles. How do you think the 800 some odd dollars (this incudes the missing BAH, COLA, and promotion pay) off your pay check would affect you and your family? I know (in my area) attempting to rent a place big enough for my family on E-4 W/O dependent pay BAH would be extremely difficult. Not to mention the outrageous prices of gas, electricity at 16.9 cents per Kilowatt, food, a car payment, cell phone, and any other unidentified expenses make it next to impossile for a family to live a heatlthy middle class life off of E-4 pay.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: tatsandjack,

No doubt that the Soldier is enduring a rough time in his career, but the spouses job isn't to go complaining to the Soldier's COC, that's the Soldier's job. If anything having and angry wife complain to the COC will do little more than piss them off. I too was once an E-4 living off w/o dependent BAH, while trying to support a wife and child. I lived 1 1/2 hours away from where I worked (the Pentagon) which cost me $20 every other day in gas. My wife had to make due with less than usual and it was a rough time. However being the man of the house I ran the issue up my chain of command until I got the desired results. If the Soldier is taking care of buisness like he should, and climbing the chain of command higher and higher, eventually someone is gonna light a fire under someone's ass and the Soldiers pay will get fixed.

As for these post being in the view of the public, they should see, or read rather, what problems real Soldiers endure each day. They should see what is going on here at home as well as aboard. Anything else would perpetuate the "no bad news, happy Soldiers" idea that is forced on to the public by the media. It's not all ways a good time in the Army, and the public should be very aware of that. As far as the foul language is concerned, whoever doesn't like it, I encourage them to never leave their home, or watch tv, or any other activity that might bring them in to contact with the real world. Bad stuff happens, and bad words exists, get over it.

Furthermore, to be so in an uproar over what is posted on these forums, and the publics opinion of such, is pointless. What we write may or may not be an indication of how we operate in our work environment. To even suggest that any one person who contributes to this post is anything less than professional, without directly observing them, is presumptuous. Bottom line, the Soldier needs to talk to his 1SG and CO. If that doesn't work he needs to go up a level, and so on and so forth until they effectively remedy the situation. His wife needs to stay in her lane and out of his CoC offices. I bet if he was getting all his pay and entitlements his wife wouldn't be running to his CoC to tell them what a great job they're doing. In short, all you Army wives, don't go and cut your husbands nuts off by running to his CoC to fix a problem he should be fixing, your job is to kick his ass when he gets home everyday the problem still exists. Out.

Addressing your discussion by paragraph:

Para 1:
I am sorry to hear of your misfortune with having to rough it out for a little while until your paper work was squared away. However, as you stated, you “ran the issue up your chain of command until you got the desired results”. In that statement you just made it abundantly clear that someone in your chain of command is squared away and was willing to help you. The reason I say this is because I know firsthand what it is like to have your chain of command do nothing to help you. For example, I needed a signature from my BN and BDE CSM and Commander for a 4187 to lift my stabilization code. I waited 4 months simply because my 1SG, day in and day out, failed to schedule an appointment with the higher ups in order to get the interviews and signatures I needed. Of course I could have just waltzed into the BN commander’s office and told her about what my situation was and what not, in my unit, those actions would result in severe consequences. The purpose of this story is to show that not all units are as squared away as others. Also, the soldier’s two units are obviously playing head games. Now I never justified her “yelling at everyone” but instead presenting the situation in a respectful manner. More on my chain of command failing to schedule my appointments, my wife ended up having to go down to my BN and talk to my CSM. Might I also mention that I asked about my appointments literally every day, but what happened when my wife stepped in?....That afternoon my interviews were complete at both echelons without any repercussions. I had also brought up the issue to the inspector general (who also did nothing) on several occasions. Again, my wife is a SSG and addressed my chain of command with the proper respect, but she still had to step-in in order to get someone’s attention.

Para 2:
Nowhere in any of my blogs did I say that soldiers shouldn’t state their problems or the reality of the army. I simply said do it professionally. Meaning maintain your military bearing, show some discipline, and watch your language when you know just as well as everyone that this is viewed by more than just military personnel. Also, you state “As far as the foul language is concerned, whoever doesn't like it, I encourage them to never leave their home, or watch TV, or any other activity that might bring them in to contact with the real world”. Now what I gather from this is you are pretty much saying that because everyone else uses fowl language its ok for us to do it. Tell me something, what do people think about when the word military comes from someone’s mouth? I’d like to believe that the image in their head is of an extremely disciplined, WELL MANNERED, and professional man or woman. I can proudly hold my head high knowing that when I walk into a Mc. Donald’s, and i hear some 16 year old kid that can’t think of any better words to express his point than “F&%& this and F%$% that”, that I do not display the same ignorant, small minded, uneducated image he is portraying to the customers with in the building. And whether you realize it or not, peoples first impressions when they read some of the discussions on this web site, are that there are a bunch of uneducated and undisciplined people in the army. I speak of this from firsthand knowledge of being both an interrogator and a recruiter. Now, don’t get me wrong, when it is just my soldiers and I, we say what we please, but while in public, we are respectful.

Para 3.
Although I will agree with you on this to a point, I will also say that perception and first impressions are reality. They set the mark for what you can expect from a soldier/ person. But I can also say that if they act a certain way in one place, chances are they act the same way in other places. A personality is a personality people don’t just change on a location to location basis. And I say “change”, not to be confused with “putting on a front”, a person can only hold a false representation of themselves for a limited time. Again, speaking from experience. And your probably right about her not applauding them, but I also know that there are A LOT of NCO’s that are quick to conduct a negative counseling but fail miserably at upholding their duty to conduct both monthly and positive counseling’s.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: tatsandjack,

More “food for thought” (sarcasm deriving from your post that I am about to quote you from), you also state “As for these post being in the view of the public, they should see, or read rather, what problems real Soldiers endure each day. They should see what is going on here at home as well as aboard”. Now if I remember correctly in an earlier blog you stated “okay...ma'am...who's in the Army? You or your husband? How about you step away from the computer, and have your husband give us a holler, okay”. Does anyone else see the contradiction here? First you say the public should hear/read the problems we endure, but as soon as someone steps to the place to bash them down because they are not military! Why does it matter who posts the problem at hand? She is not entitled to freedom of speech because of her occupational status? Please show me where it is against the law for her to voice her PROBLEM that her husband, a “REAL SOLDIER” is having!!! Also, if you would, in your next blog, include the definition of what a “real soldier” is. finially just thinking ahead at what you might respond with based on your recent posts, if it has anything to do with a certain MOS or CMF, I would like you to remember that no MOS wins the war single handedly.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: tatsandjack,

She may have gotten it fixed but it's NOT HER PLACE. IT'S YOUR JOB!!!

I dont' know a nicer way to put it or a more blunt way to put it. Weren't you slightly embarassed by the fact that you couldn't do it yourself and had to have your wife come in to fix your problems? If it's such an easy fix for her then why didn't you do the exact same thing with the same amount of tact that she used and get it done yourself? There is an open door policy for you, it's not meant for your wife to come in and do it.

I'm not saying your a bad person or a bad soldier or whatever, I'm just saying, if it's sooooo important, then why couldn't YOU handle it just as easily as your wife?

As a spouse and former soldier myself I will say this and nothing more, IT IS NOT YOUR SPOUSES PLACE TO FIX YOUR PROBLEMS.

Wow, you are totally missing the point. The reason I couldn’t do it is because I am trying to get interviews that are favorable on my part. In my units SOP it clearly states that you must go through your chain of command and your company commander must receive an approval from the BN commander in order to see him. Now, it doesn’t appear it has dawned on you yet but the NCO’s and officers in my unit are lazy and very often power trip. So, by violating the SOP, which would very quickly lead to an Article 15, and going straight to the CSM would pretty much throw that interview out the window and I would still be stuck in that unit. Another situation, much like the lady earlier in this forum, my wife is a full time student, she ended up not being able to go to school for four months because every day my 1SG literally said “you will get your interview tomorrow”. So after about two months of this I went to IG….I have come to realize IG doesn’t care about anything unless someone is breaking the law. In no way shape or form that I know of is procrastinating against any regulation. Another thing to think about is do you really think that a complaint against a 1SG is really going to do anything to him? He is a senior noncommissioned officer…..it pretty much takes an act of god to implement any degree of punishment to phase him unless it involves fraternization. Again im sure you know nothing of the CAV but it is really big on positive publicity and its outstanding reputation. So anything about the CAV ruining someone’s educational benefits is extremely feared. And yes I probably could have gotten it done myself, but the end result and the goal of getting out of that unit would not have been accomplished. Sometimes you have to think outside the box and find alternate avenues of approach. In this case the smartest way to go was to have my wife present the issue. And if you are so big on the wives not stepping into a soldiers carrier maybe you should take that issue up with the FRG, is the FRG leader not the spokes person to the commander about the families situations and problems with the unit? I know in my unit and several other units I have served with the FRG has a huge impact on a lot of the decisions made within the unit. Without the soldiers family supporting them you have nothing but a mere body in a uniform.

I cant believe you people cant get off the fact that its not just MY problem, when my unit is affecting her education, health, and finances it becomes HER problem too!
Wait until your husbands unit pulls a fast one on him and it affects you. You will come to the quick realization that when you are married to a soldier you are married to the army as well.

In response to your post on my post, telling the wife to "step away from the computer". She is entitled to say what she wishes when and where her little heart desires. However the point was she's making a lot of noise on an issue that her husband should be making noise about, especially on these forums. Second, the situation I mentioned about my self having a rough time, I ran all the way up to the brigade level, because the folks in my chain of command were not "squared away", and I used the OPEN DOOR POLICY. I did so without fear of reprisal, as I knew if I felt I was suffering negatively for my use of the command open door policy, I could simply contact IG, and believe you me no command wants that kind of attention. They weren't willing to call my bluff, and I finished out my time without incident. My wife did not have to come to my job to do what I, as a Soldier should be doing. As far as the definition of "real Soldiers", I challenge you to find where in this topic did I mention or use the term "real Soldiers". In the end it boils down to this Soldier needing to get on the ball and take care of buisness. If he has to ask his 1SG to assist him more than once, that in my opinion is enough to take it to the company commander, and if the CO can't get it squared away, than he should tactfully and respectfully inform his chain of command that he will excersise the battalion commanders open door policy. If the Battalion commander can't get it straight then you take up to brigade level. Trust me, by the time it gets that high up, somebody is gonna be asking why isn't this Soldiers problem fixed. Finally as a Soldier and NCO, I carry myself in a manner that exudes professionalism in and out of uniform, even more so when in public. However on this forum if the Soldier can't be themselves and speak freely, there would be almost no point in posting anything. If the public bases it's opinion of the Army and it's service memebers by what they read here, than I'd have to say they are getting one of the most honest impressions of who we are. Whether they like it or not is neither here nor there, since they do not wear the uniform, and do not go through what we do day in and day out. We are held to a higher standard than the average civilian, I'll give you that, but this community is one that allows the Soldier to unwind and for a few hours talk to one another like normal people. No one that post on this forum is held to any standard above their own, no need for military bearing here, no rank, just straight man to man (not exculding females, just speaking in generalities) talk. Excessive profanity, I agree isn't neccessary but an F-bomb here and there, no big deal. Long story short, you and I will just have to agree to disagree on some points and leave it at that, as going back and forth will only increase our chances of developing carpal tunnel syndrome, lol. SGT.T has left the building.

Well, our units obviously operate differently. My unit is notorious for undeserved article 15’s and believe me people have filed complaints. Had I done what you did, I would have gotten hemmed up (most likely because they know if I got to IG nothing will happen). A good example of this is I was trying to make sure my promotion packet was squared away so I needed to go to S-1. In my BN no one is allowed into S-1 but our OPS NCO. So I asked my 1st line to ask the ops to check it out. Two weeks go by after numerous attempts to get someone to go see it I went strait to the OPS NCO (litteraly in the room beside us) and asked her to check it out. She says sure and once again I remind her as I did my 1st line everyday….she still did nothing. So three days before the board now I decide to go to see the promotions S-1 clerk (a PFC) just to open up my packet…..I opened it to find that they had lost my last set of official transcripts, the commanders evaluation, awards paperwork, and the 3355. So I say alright we will have to redo some of this but no big deal I have copies of most of what you need but those were the last sets of official transcripts (my unit will not take the transcripts unless they are in a envelope and sealed with the schools official stamp). When I came back later that afternoon with some of the paperwork, guess who was walking out of S-1…the 1st line…..did he check on my pack?.....not a chance….but what he does decide to check is whether or not I have enough counseling statements to summon an article 15 for insubordination and failure to obey a direct order….. I don’t….so he makes enough by writing one for failure to obey a direct for going to the OPS NCO, and another for going to the S-1 shop and another for claiming disrespect to an NCO because I told him he needs to get his S%#^ together because he is messing with soldiers lives for no reason. He submitted the paper work to the 1sg and commander. I got chewed out for about an hour for being an NCO (CPL) and needing to set a better example. As bogus as this sounds it is completely a true story I had never received a negative counseling statement until that day. So I said rog-o ill drive on, I sucked it up and went around their backs by having my wife present the issue, now I can in no way be held accountable for her going to the BN commander. I can guarantee you that there would have been an article 15 awaiting me, especially because they just received 3 negative counseling’s for me about insubordination But yes we will agree to disagree. Although, I will agree with you on saying she shouldn’t come on here saying “screw the army” and those sort things if she has not too had to live some of the life styles we have been forced to live. However, I do think it is ok for her to come on here, post a problem and/ or vent in a respectful manner , and attempt to receive some advice from an outside source.

quote:

[QUOTE]Originally posted by SGT. T:
As for these post being in the view of the public, they should see, or read rather, what problems real Soldiers endure each day. They should see what is going on here at home as well as aboard.

Wow tats. That's pretty jacked up. I would have been kicked outta the army 3 years ago if that was my unit.

haha, right though man?! They were out of control! Everyone in this situation had numerous IG and EO complaints against them in numbers exceeding 3-4 complaints per person averaging in about 75 % of the company making the complaints, to include fellow NCO’s. But like I said, unless its fraternization or sexual harassment, IG takes no interest in the matter. I am just very happy I am out of that unit. We received a new 1SG and Commander right as I left and from what I hear from buddies back at the unit the NCO’s described in above texts are being dealt with accordingly and the unit is improving very rapidly.