please help, i've just come down on orders for ft campbell. (report date 10Jan) my coc has been aware for the past 2 yrs that i have been the sole care giver for my brothers kids. however they never required me to get a fcp and my brother and i never found it necessary to take it through the courts for legal guardianship. we do however have an affidavite so that i can do the doctor and school etc. the kids have been through enough moves an such and i cannot do it to them again. their lives are actually becoming more stable. im sorry to say but my kids are more important than the army. what do i need to do to keep from being pcs'd or chaptered. my 1SG is in no way supporting my decision only because i reenlisted but i reenlisted before they came to me.
my question is if you are the sole care giver for your brothers kids, where is your brother? im not positive but im pretty sure if hes around and you want custody of the kids it wouldnt take long if thats what needs to happen. lots of families get pcsed every year and they and thier kids manage to live, heh. if your planning on making a career in the Army then i would suggest not getting comfortable anywhere you can come down on orders after being stationed CONUS for 2yrs and OCONUS for i think 1yr.(i could be wrong) the chapter process is pretty lengthy and unfortuately leads to reduction in rank and pay, unless you can get away with a hardship chapter. if you are the care giver to those kids i cant see that being a good alternative to just pcs'ing and finishing your contract.
Originally posted by christian7r: my coc has been aware for the past 2 yrs that i have been the sole care giver for my brothers kids.
If you are the sole care giver, but nothing is really legal, you are their aunt (or uncle) and they are visiting.
Are the kids enrolled in DEERS? Are they living on post with you (if you reside on post)? Are these kids your dependents, by the military standard?
If the kids are not in your records as being your dependents, how can anyone really know they you're a single parent and require anything official.
quote:
Originally posted by christian7r: my brother and i never found it necessary to take it through the courts for legal guardianship.
Ignorance is not an excuse. By you not knowing, or by trying tp bypass the system, is not the system's fault. It seems you tried to save some money and not get anything done official and now you're blaming your chain of command for not supporting you.
What happens when you PCS to Fort Campbell and you deply in a couple months? It seems you (and your brother) need to grow up a little because neither one of you can really truly care for this situation the right way.
you have a right to your opinion but i believe your perception is incorrect. i also believe that many are against soldiers gettin out b/c of kids but you have a right to believe that way as well. my kids will not be tossed around yes i do consider them mine. an no we are not trying to bypass the system any way. we made an arrangment when the mother's issues began to affect the children and he is constantly traveling. there was no saving money we just never needed to have me listed as the legal guardian because there were no issues between the three of us. howver we did have an affidavit done so that i could have them enrolled in school etc. there was no need to change their doctors, i still have the same doctor from the day i was born. my chain of command has known since the beginning that i have been caring for them. ive even received christmas house etc... now that I have come down on orders the command requested that i do a fcp but disagree with the fact that i am against moving the children again. an yes i did reenlist to stay inand was planning to make a career but then i gained two children whose lives are much more important. we are currently working through the courts to get the proper legal stuff required for the army. I was just trying to get some more information on what i need to do to make this situation right.
So did you just expect to never PCS for the rest of your Army career? You said you planned on staying in. Either you are naive or have no idea of your surroundings if you think that you are going to spend 20 years in the same place in the Army.
For someone who swears how important these kids are you would think you might have thought of the possibility of PCSing at some point in the future instead of living in lala land.
i came here to get help not ridiculed by those who are perceiving this situation entirely the wrong way. if there is anyone that can actually help me in fixing this then i would appreciate it if not then your comment is not required nor desired.
Originally posted by 35M3L00PF: So did you just expect to never PCS for the rest of your Army career? You said you planned on staying in. Either you are naive or have no idea of your surroundings if you think that you are going to spend 20 years in the same place in the Army.
For someone who swears how important these kids are you would think you might have thought of the possibility of PCSing at some point in the future instead of living in lala land.
Originally posted by christian7r: i came here to get help not ridiculed by those who are perceiving this situation entirely the wrong way. if there is anyone that can actually help me in fixing this then i would appreciate it if not then your comment is not required nor desired.
Sorry, I have no clue on your situation but there are people on this board that have nothing better to do then ridicule others for asking questions. They think the Army is all about their rank always being correct. This is why I'm getting out. Leaders out for themselves and not interested in helping soldiers.
Originally posted by christian7r: please help, i've just come down on orders for ft campbell. (report date 10Jan) my coc has been aware for the past 2 yrs that i have been the sole care giver for my brothers kids. however they never required me to get a fcp and my brother and i never found it necessary to take it through the courts for legal guardianship. we do however have an affidavite so that i can do the doctor and school etc. the kids have been through enough moves an such and i cannot do it to them again. their lives are actually becoming more stable. im sorry to say but my kids are more important than the army. what do i need to do to keep from being pcs'd or chaptered. my 1SG is in no way supporting my decision only because i reenlisted but i reenlisted before they came to me.
Sounds like you reenlisted wanting to stay in (not caring if you would PCS) then the kids came to your life and now you dont want to PCS. Understand that, but you are in the Army, YOU WILL end up PCSing at one point in time, either that or you stay there for now and get chaptered out...you say you dont want to PCS or get chaptered, well I dont see how you are going to stay there even if its till the end of your current contract. Im sorry but you really have no choice, you need to PCS or maybe get out and take care of the children if thats what you think its best (once they are legally under you and you are required a Family Care Plan, if you cannot come up with one you can get chaptered out).
Lead by Example!!!
Posts: 1205 | Location: Somewhere in the US | Registered: 13 September 2007
Originally posted by christian7r: i came here to get help not ridiculed by those who are perceiving this situation entirely the wrong way. if there is anyone that can actually help me in fixing this then i would appreciate it if not then your comment is not required nor desired.
Sorry, I have no clue on your situation but there are people on this board that have nothing better to do then ridicule others for asking questions. They think the Army is all about their rank always being correct. This is why I'm getting out. Leaders out for themselves and not interested in helping soldiers.
Nothing better to do? We have Soldiers coming onto the board complaining because they think they are getting the short end of the stick when it's their fault they are in the situation they are in. The solution was basically provided to them by their unit and they're not interested in hearing it. How anyone could figure that they could never PCS and therefore never bother to fill out the paperwork for such an important subject is beyond me.
Don't be so stupid to assume this has anything to do with rank. This is more about common sense.
Nothing better to do? We have Soldiers coming onto the board complaining because they think they are getting the short end of the stick when it's their fault they are in the situation they are in. The solution was basically provided to them by their unit and they're not interested in hearing it. How anyone could figure that they could never PCS and therefore never bother to fill out the paperwork for such an important subject is beyond me.
Don't be so stupid to assume this has anything to do with rank. This is more about common sense.[/QUOTE]
Well put. no offense to the original poster but it seems like either you were not ready to have that kind of responisbility, or your using them to stay in the area where im guessing your from orginially from the statement of using the same doctor when you were a kid. Im guessing the rest of your family is in the area also to include syblings and parents and extended family. all im gunna say is play by the book and you'll be ok. try to pull some sneaky stuff and the army will find out eventually and you will wind up feeling what the short end of the stick really is. good luck with what ever you do.
Originally posted by christian7r: i came here to get help not ridiculed by those who are perceiving this situation entirely the wrong way. if there is anyone that can actually help me in fixing this then i would appreciate it if not then your comment is not required nor desired.
Sorry, I have no clue on your situation but there are people on this board that have nothing better to do then ridicule others for asking questions. They think the Army is all about their rank always being correct. This is why I'm getting out. Leaders out for themselves and not interested in helping soldiers.
Nothing better to do? We have Soldiers coming onto the board complaining because they think they are getting the short end of the stick when it's their fault they are in the situation they are in. The solution was basically provided to them by their unit and they're not interested in hearing it. How anyone could figure that they could never PCS and therefore never bother to fill out the paperwork for such an important subject is beyond me.
Don't be so stupid to assume this has anything to do with rank. This is more about common sense.
I fully agree that its common sence people PCS. Should have know that with reenlisting and all but no need to tell the person to quit living in lala land. No need to insult the person. Just give them facts to back up your responce. Isn't that what an NCO is suposed to do?
Whatever man. I'm not going to argue with anyone about it any longer. I really don't care enough to bother.
The answers have already been given and the OP doesn't have an interest in the guidelines, regulations, or whatever his/her unit originally told them (which is correct).
Sometimes people need a wake up call. Yes, the person is living in lala land by thinking they are going to skate through the next 15 or so years without ever needing to follow the regulation and stay in one spot at the same duty location.
We can all whisper and pat the Soldier on the shoulder and say what bad luck or we can give the hard honest truth. I see what kind of person you are, but I'm not that way. I'm just giving straight up honest answers.
The thing that set me off was the attitude that the 1SG or the unit was not trying to help the Soldier. I'm sure this Soldier tells everyone how terrible the Army is because they won't work with him/her. I've heard it before. But yet the REAL issue is that this Soldier tried to circumvent the system and either didn't expect to or refused to believe he/she would PCS at some point in 20 years. If I had a dollar for every time something like this happened to someone in my unit I could get separated for coming into a lot of money.
The bottom line is the unit is TRYING to work with the Soldier (suggesting he/she do an FCP, etc). The Soldier re-enlisted having to know full well that at some point he/she would be PCSd or deployed. This isn't the unit's fault! There is nothing in a re-enlistment contract that says "Soldier will stay in the same location for the duration of the contract and by the way don't bother to follow the regulations and fill out an FCP or make family arrangements." The Soldier can either do the necessary paperwork and PCS the children or can move without them. There isn't much leeway here since the Army has regulations set in place for this kind of situation.
I could TOTALLY understand if everything was done by the book and the Army was screwing this Soldier over. But this situation is like being upset at your chain of command for "not supporting me" for failing an APFT. You didn't meet the standards or regulation. There isn't anything the unit can do about it. We are all in the military bound by endless regulations and guidelines that we have no control over. The best thing we can do is follow the guidelines to make our lives as easy as possible while still conforming to the system that we VOLUNTEERED for.
christian7r, I understand your situation, I know you're trying your best for the kids, but YOU need to go to PSB, and see what it takes to get the kids enrolled in DEERS, and listed as your dependents....immediately!! You need to have a serious sit down talk with your brother, he seems like he needs to help out, I don't know the whole situation, but who gives there kids to a single military person, to provide a stable home, while he is "traveling"!! Especially with the high OPTEMPO of todays Army!! So bottom line is you need to get the kids listed as yours and enrolled in DEERS, and get chaptered, no you probably won't lose rank or be in trouble. Or your brother needs to take responsibility of his own children.......if he's a civilian, HE can get a job that suits his family where he does'nt have to travel........you're a Soldier......you don't have that option........GOOD LUCK!!
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