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On orders to Korea while getting a divorce
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Picture of NCOES SGL 68W3L8Y9
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I am a 12 year in service SSG. I recently petitioned for divorce after my wife left me and my two boys (age 10 and 2). She moved out and does not provide any monetary support. She only comes and picks them up every other day for a few hours. I been awarded temporary conservatorship pending the final decree which we "EXPECT" it to be aruling of" Joint Management Conservatoryship" (the default in Texas) with me being the primary conservator.

Problem is that I just received orders to Korea for a year. Since the divorce is not final yet, I cannot ask for an accompanied tour (going to Seoul to MEDDAC). I cannot get passports or request overseas screenings without my wife's signature.

I am requesting a deferrement in order to give me time to figure things out, but even if it gets approved, it is only 120 days. I am making the request hoping that the 120 days will give me time to get the final order of divorce and permission to take my boys with me. Problem is that because I will not be SOLE MANAGER CONSERVATOR, I can have geographical restrictions for the boys.

If this is the case, and I cannot take my boys to Korea, i was planning to sign a DCSS and get out in order to take care of my boys. I am not told I DO NOT qualify for a DCSS because I m indefinite (re-up).

Over the past few weeks my wife stated to friends her intent of waiting for me to go so she could file, then I could do nothing. So I went ahead and filed, but it seems like I will have no option but to go to Korea wihtout my boys.

PLEASE HELP! can I sign a DCSS? can I request hardship separation?

I have read the regs on it states that recent award of custody is not grounds for compassionate reassignment/deletion in itself.
 
Posts: 5 | Registered: 14 March 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post

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I'm assuming your at the school house at Fort Sam. If I were you I would talk to my CSM or Commander and see if they can have your orders deleted or deferred. Informing your chain of command is the best option for you at this point.
 
Posts: 12 | Registered: 10 January 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post

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Get your COC involved. Get your Chaplain involved. See if some type of compassionate delete of orders. You need allies fighting for you. If it come to it, get your congressional representatives involved. Also, you can't DCSS, but you should be able to file for separation. Maybe it would get approved.
 
Posts: 259 | Registered: 23 December 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post

Picture of NCOES SGL 68W3L8Y9
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My Commandant, 1SG and CoC are fully supportive,a nd I am thankful for having a CoC that actually cares. I have put a request for deferment for 120 days but that's not 100% sure it will get approved.

I am asking in case it does not get approved?

If my court dates are past my PCS report date and I am not here to go to court, I am told by the court (and my attorney) that I would automaticaly default in my case and the court would decide without me being present, which means that my wife would have my children.

I asked about a DCSS and was told I do not meet the criteria for it since I am "indef". Under AR 635-200, divorce or custody proceedings are not solely grounds for compassionate reassignment/deletion.

Last resort to be able to keep my children is to get out of the service which I wish I didn't have to, but my boys are my priority. My question still remains, how can I get out of the service if I am on orders to Korea and going would mean giving up my children?
 
Posts: 5 | Registered: 14 March 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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