I'm in a really odd situation. I have a good buddy who has been having problems with his wife for a long time. He and I are in the Army, she is not. After about a year of them slowly breaking up they finally ended it. I am real good friends with her. To try and help them get adjusted I allowed her to stay at my place off post on the couch at night. She didn't want to stay in the same house with him and he even said he was ok with it. He told her and he told me he was ok with it. He ended up talking to the Chaplin and when the Chaplin heard the situation he thought that me and her were having sex.
I got called in to see the Commander. The Chaplin, XO, my E-6 and my E-7 were all in there. I was told that I could have UCMJ brought against me for the "Perception of Adultery" I was surprised since nothing was going on and I didn't know I could get busted for "perception" The Chaplin wanted to max me but everyone else fought for me and the only thing that happened was I was given a no-contact order so I could not see her. They are just trying to help and keep me from ruining my career by getting UCMJ brought upon myself. I understand and appreciate them for it.
I would like to get the no contact order lifted though. I understand I made a mistake in judgment. I would like to talk to her because we were really good friends. The buddy of mine has even told me to talk to her. I told him I can't because of the no contact order.
I guess the main question I have is, once they are legally separated would there be grounds for a no contact order? Or would I have to wait until the divorce is final. Also, is it even true that I could have UCMJ brought against me for the "Perception of Adultery?"
If you value your career, right now you need to cool it and stay away from her- no matter how little or much will go on.
The ONLY way there would be no "perception of adultery" going on is after the divorce is final. Kinda sucks, huh?
Command just wants to minimize issues between you, her, him and the unit. Even if you're all cool with it and there really is NOTHING going on, the unit could be thinking things. --That's not good for unit discipline and cohesiveness..
Be Proud of what you do- and do it Well! ~me
Posts: 5281 | Location: Ft Gordon (Again!!!) :-| | Registered: 22 October 2007
I have to believe that you have left out somethings, so I need to lump you with then norm of army behavior which is not good seems some people never out grow fraternity life. The army and your chaplain may be trying to put a band aid on the behavior that some find the norm within the army circle. The same was true years ago of drunkeness and spousal abuse. I am glad that they overcame that one and now we have a better quality of soldier who at least gets a designated driver and not treat wives like punching bags. Yes it does hurt units when so many fellow soldiers jam up units with their unrestrained animal behavior.
I had a soldier in the same situation. The no contact order was lifted once the divorce was final. It can also be lifted if you change units, but there is a good chance the new command will just slap it back on.
Posts: 6 | Location: Ft. Hood | Registered: 29 November 2005
I had a soldier in the same situation, the command was accusing him of adultery. Adeultery is a very touchy subject and unleast you see them in the act of having sex they are innocent. Needless to say my soldier went to jag and the command found themselves in real trouble. SO go to Jag and see what your rights are
I have a situation pretty much nothing remotely similar to this. I'm deployed and I was caught hugging my girlfriend before going to work. Let me clarify, we are both single. We both are the same rank. We were caught holding each other by my SGM. Our unit just placed a no contact order between us for the next 12 months. Can anybody help me with finding out anything about PDA? Is it punishble under UCMJ? I want to fight this desperately but I'm just wondering what I face in terms of losing. This seem IMMENSELY extreme for the severity of the crime. I need feedback!!