I have 11 years in, was planning to ETS in the next 18 months. I have 2 kids and I'm married to veteran who was medically retired. My oldest son is from my first marriage and is special needs, medical and behavioral. His real father is deceased. I also have an almost 2 year old with my husband. My issue is, my husband took a job in another state while I was TDY. My mom had to fly out to stay with my kids until I could get home. However, she is already raising one of my nephews and cannot handle all 3. She is also afraid of taking care of the special needs child by herself during, say, a deployment. My husband is going through training for his job and cannot take the kids. He also did a horrible job with them while I was gone and due to his own medical issues, he's really not fit to care for them alone. I have notified my chain of command of the issue, and AR 600-20 does include Soldiers who live apart from their spouse as requiring a FCP. I am speaking to my command tomorrow about this but I was wondering if they can make me stay in even though I have no long term care provider.