I am currently deployed with a Patriot unit. My wife is prior service, and suffers from PTSD, anxiety and depression. Before our deployment, she became pregnant with our son. The doctor requested that I be a late deployer due to the pregnancy being classified high risk due to my wifes mental ailments and a blood disorder that could cause her to hemorrage if she over exerted herself. This request was denied, and I deployed with the main body of the unit. Before I left, my wife and I developed a family care plan that consisted of her aunt, who resides in Florida, and her grandmother who resides in Dallas, TX. We are currently stationed in Fort Hood. While deployed, the FRG refused to help my wife with household duties, which resulted in our son shifting before delvery. The docter then sent a red cross message to the unit requesting my presence to ensure that she didn't lose the baby or suffer further complications. This request was also denied. During delivery, both my wife and son almost died. Darnall army medical hospital completely butchered my wife during the delivery and she now suffers from several post surgery injuries and ailments as a result. Due to the tramatic nature of the delivery and the fact that they both almost lost their lives, my wife now suffers from post partum depression in conjunction with the previously stated mental health issues. All of this is documented in our EFMP, her VA claim, and her medical records. Due to the fact that they would not let me come home until my R&R leave block, our aunt had to take all of her vacation time for the year to fly to Fort Hood to assist my wife. She is now unable to assist again unless she quits her job. Our grandmother, who was once fully capable of caring for my wife and children, has fallen ill and can no longer perform in that capaicty. My wifes mental health provider sent another red cross message requesting my presence, whoch was once again denied. I was told by our BN commander that until all other agencies and resources were exhausted, he would not entertain the possibility of sending me back. The FRG has refused to help unless we move our children into one of their homes for the duration of the deployment. CYS has been utilized, but the fact that my wife was prescribed several medications to include Xanax which she takes at night, this is ineffective as well. CYS can not care for my children at night while my wife is taking Xanax. The unit stated that they would ask Darnall if they could send a nurse to our home at night to care for our children, which of course was denied. My son has issues breathing because of the tramatic nature of the delivery, and only a medically trained person would be suitable to watch him. My wife had to take special classes to be able to care for him. I expressed all of my concerns to the chain of command, and was caounseled on my lack of a family care plan. I told them that if that's what it takes to ensure the safety of my wife and children then so be it. My wife has expressed suicidal thoughts, and the chain of command is pretty much rolling the dice on whether or not she will do it. I know she will, because she has attemtped before, and if I hadn't walked in when I did, she would have succeeded. The BN commander is determined to keep me here even with all these things in play. He has all but ignored the family care plan chapter process. What can i do to make this process faster. I have filed a congressional and spoken to my senator. Is there anything else I can do? Thank you in advance for your informative responses.
Original Post
5–8. Involuntary separation due to parenthood
a. Soldiers will be considered for involuntary separation when parental obligations interfere with fulfillment of
military responsibilities. (See AR 600–20, chapter 5, concerning Soldiers’ responsibilities for care of family members
as related to military responsibilities.) Specific reasons for separation because of parenthood include—
(1) Inability to perform prescribed duties satisfactorily.
(2) Repeated absenteeism.
(3) Repeated tardiness.
(4) Inability to participate in field training exercises or perform special duties such as CQ and staff duty noncommissioned
officer (NCO).
(5) Non-availability for worldwide assignment or deployment according to the needs of the Army.
b. Separation processing may not be initiated under this paragraph until the Soldier has been adequately counseled
concerning deficiencies and has been afforded the opportunity to overcome them. (See para 1–16 and AR 600–20.)
c. The notification procedure (see chap 2, sec I) will be used for separation under this paragraph.
AR 635–200 • 6 June 2005 53
d. For characterization of service or description of separation, see paragraph 5–1.
e. Commanders specified in paragraph 1–19 are authorized to order separation under this paragraph. See paragraph
1–11 for additional instructions for ARNGUS and USAR Soldiers. The criteria in chapter 1, section VII, will govern
whether the Soldier will be released from AD or ADT with transfer to the IRR, or whether he/she will be discharged

I don't see in there where it says that it's only for dual military or single parents. If I'm wrong then I'm wrong but I don't it in black and white.
Ok I looked at AR 600-20 and yes, only dual military and single parents are REQUIRED to have a family care plan, however service members pending deployment are recommended to product one. And if parenthood interferes with military duties, separation can be conducted. I have already received a counseling stating that I have 90 days to produce a care plan. But that time starts when I return to home station. And as stated, my BN commander is trying to hold me here.
Good Morning,

I hope I'm in the right forum to ask this question. I would like some information on the process of being chaptered out. I know that each case and place is different. My son was told he's going to be chaptered out, he made a mistake and has never been in trouble. He doesn't want to be chaptered out and talked with the 1st Sgt. and his CO. His first Sgt. said it was out of his hands. His CO said he would talk for him, but really didn't give him a yes or no. My son even said please give me an Article 15, let me prove to you that I'm Soldier material. The CO called him back to his office the next day and basically asked him was he married, did he have kids, what he would do if he got out....just questions like that. He's been to talk to the chaplain, and the specialist. Which the specialist was A LOT of help to my son. My son isn't doing his MOS, but jobs that they are asking him to do..I guess detailing. He's still doing PT with his Platoon, and Formation. He hasn't given up. I want to know the process of this and how long it will take. He hasn't given up...I'm proud of him for acknowledging his mistake....it's not a lesson if it's not learned..and I believe my son learned a valuable lesson that could cost him his Army career. Any advice and information would be helpful.
Things like this are highly circumstantial. I understand if you don't feel comfortable disclosing the details of his situation in an open forum, but without details, it's impossible to advise you on your son's situation. If you would like to speak to someone and don't have anyone else to speak with, feel free to email me and I will do my best to provide you with answers.
Wow..this is just...disgusting. The whole chain of command are pieces of shit. If a Soldier has a wife with a high risk pregnancy and they are not allowed to go home from a deployment..someone seriously needs to be relieved. My wife is high risk as well and I'm about a month away from knowing if I have to go home early from my deployment as well. CoC has no problem with it. I hope you can find something to help you out to get you home to take care of your family. I would be irrate if I were you.
Unfortunately the entire command from the brigade down has a way of keeping things in house, even after I speak to someone above their level. They just pretty much talk their way out of it. But I have escalated this matter far beyond the reach of anyone in my CoC, and my Senator and Congressman are furious and seeking answers, so hopefully there's some movement on this soon. I don't want to keep rolling the dice on this since my wifes mental health provider has stated that her mental state is on a slow decline due to the stress and lack of support. I know the unit has a mission to accomplish, but I am nowhere near mission essential, as I have hand trained 11 Soldiers to be able to perform my duties in my absence.
He's been to the Chaplain, Specialist...I'm not sure what that is in the Army, but gave him great council. A room inspection was done and empty Spice packets were found in his room. The Specialist said he should have asked for an attorney...( I'm not sure what good that would have done) So, now what's the process....and is there anything he can do to TRY to stay in the Army?
Originally posted by JstlikeU:
He's been to the Chaplain, Specialist...I'm not sure what that is in the Army, but gave him great council. A room inspection was done and empty Spice packets were found in his room. The Specialist said he should have asked for an attorney...( I'm not sure what good that would have done) So, now what's the process....and is there anything he can do to TRY to stay in the Army?
Do you have any suggestions or any advice? And, how long will the chaptering out process take? His CO did tell him that he would talk for him and also, he was not getting a dishonorable discharge. Hopefully, he will keep his word. My son is still participating in formation and Pt.
If your son does in fact get an honorable discharge, his best bet is to start seeking civilian employment now. The transition to civilian from military can be somewhat daunting if not executed efficiently. He should begin the ACAP process as soon as possible, and ensure that he is aware of all benefits and services afforded to those who obtain honorable discharge. Being prepared for his separation is the best thing for him moving forward.
He's talked to his CO 2x, he's talked to his 1st Sgt. He's been to see the Chaplain, He just met a specialist yesterday while talking to the Chaplain. The Specialist told him it was quite evident he didn't have a substance abuse issue.That he was at the mercy of his CO. I just am worried...I apologize. I know my son messed up....I just wish he was giving a 2nd chance....
The length of the process varies greatly. If he hasn't signed anything, the process hasn't started yet, and there is a chance that he may not be chaptered. But if they do decide to chapter him, as soon as he is aware of their intent, he should begin to seek employment as soon as possible. Just because he isn't officially out of the army yet doesn't mean that he can't begin to inquire about potential employment.
Thank you for your time....and answers. He's a Soldier that made a HUGE MISTAKE, and he is a SOLDIER until he is officially Chaptered out. I will ask him again if he has signed any paperwork yet....I'm praying that he is given a 2nd chance.
Any advice...Should he go speak to the CO again?
Today my son was sent to the ER by his 1st Sgt. while he was doing/ helping other Soldiers load a generator on a tractor trailer it was not secured rolled back landed on his foot and broke my son's toe. His first Sgt. went with my son to the ER and the Dr. referred my son to a specialist because he may need surgery. Since this has happened, what will happen with his other issue going on. By the way, my son confirmed he still hadn't signed any kind of papers.
I'm just worried about him. I'm not there, he's brought this situation on himself, but since this has happened it's been one bad luck thing after another happening ex: his car broke down, the generator fell on his foot.
His 1st Sgt. did go with him to the ER yesterday and also to the Dr. This morning, I'm assuming that's protocol. My son's foot I broke. He said his 1st Sgt. told him to make sure he's 100% healed because if not the Army is responsible as it was their negligence and not his. He has to go give a written statement later of his injury which is no problem because the 1st Sgt was there when it happened so he knows. I know I shouldn't worry because God has already taken care of the outcome,but I do & I wish I knew more of what he needs to do , can do or IF there is anything else that should be done.
Speaking from experience, the absolute worst thing you could do is take this resposibility on as your own. I really think you both need to prepare mentally for either situation. As you said, this is in God's hands, and the best thing you or your son can do is pray and prepare.
God's plan is not for the Army to give my so a 2nd chance. He takes his final physical next week. I pray my son has learned a lesson, he lost a lot. He says he has. It's not the end of the road, just another road to a different journey, his loss is not a gain if he didn't/ doesn't learn the lesson......thank you for your help & also being kind with your answers.

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